MommyBlabs: I NEED A BREAK!

The longer I am as a mother, the more I understand how the public forms a type of expectation from either working moms or stay-at-home moms.

I never liked the idea of having a set of mentality forced upon someone.

If a working mom decides to take 30 minutes off from their kids to do whatever they please, so be it.

If a stay-at-home mom decides to do a mani or pedi, so be it!

She deserves a BREAK!

DO NOT JUDGE!

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No doubt that I feel guilty as hell whenever I leave my baby with my parents or in laws to go do my own thing, BUT that couple of hours away could potentially make me feel so much more better about myself to be mentally and emotionally ready for whatever it is installed for me for the week (be it work or family drama).

Voice in my mind: “Just some time for yourself maybe is all you need to have in order to show a better version of you for the family / work.”

I would usually try to sneak in a couple of hours over the weekend to have a date with hubby, play a game, read a book or get a massage (if i feel like it).

It is NOT selfish if I took a couple hours off to just unwind and get my mind off certain things.

I understand that family comes first, but when I feel like I can’t handle the world, it is always best to step back and shut the world out for a moment (this helped me greatly).

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Some people told me: “You have it all together like a small perfect family. You need to add more babies!”

Me (voice in my mind): “GIRL! Let me tell you something. My family ain’t perfect and I’m just like any momma’s out there trying to get her shit together on a daily basis”

Me (verbally): Life isn’t perfect (in fact, far from perfect), but I’m happy with what I’m blessed with. Not thinking about another baby yet.

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Give mothers a break and seriously get over the stereotype that a mother should be perfect in EVERYTHING and be ever present in every situation thrown at them.

We can break at any moment and when we do, please do not judge us.

Sometimes we just gotta do what we gotta do to just be ourselves, which some may or may not accept (I’m totally fine with this).

I went through a serious mental struggle a few months back and taking a step back to have a break to find myself again changed the way I look at things now.

Some might call it depression, some might call it a breakdown and some just have other terms, but for me, what I needed (and still will) was some space and time to find myself.

Perhaps just do you because being Ms. Perfect isn’t all it is to life.

Hang in there and look at life positively.

Toodles!

MommyBlabs: Being A New Mommy (The Good & The Bad)

good wings

I would like to start by saying, hands down, being a mama is not easy (especially a new one).

When Owen arrived, I felt overwhelmed with the responsibility of ensuring this mini human lives.

He still teaches me what it feels like when your heart is walking around on the outside (every single day).

More happiness in the house with his smiles and laughter.

Love and forgiveness is unbelievably stretched to a surprising extend as I am not a good example to live by when it comes to my temper.

I also learned to put my mobile phone away when he is around to avoid missing every precious moment.

Time spent together is more memorable as the three of us try to capture every single moment either with our cameras, phones or storing it into our sweet and precious memories.

The innocence Owen brings whenever he laugh to simple things melt my heart every day.

Who knew life would be this simple?

I never knew being a mama would be this rewarding.

good wings

As there are almost always bad when there’s good.

Even reading articles before Owen’s arrival did not prepare myself with the psychological battle.

Me, myself and I.

I wasn’t happy with my physical appearance after delivery with a saggy tummy and terrible sleepless look on a daily basis.

I felt especially helpless after delivering Owen because I couldn’t do much to help around the house and to take care of my baby.

I felt like I wasn’t enough for my husband and son.

I was worried whenever Owen was out of sight due to the fear of someone taking him away from me.

I cried when Owen had jaundice as I was helpless as a mother.

All those emotions of guilt, helplessness and uselessness kept pouring in until at times I would breakdown alone in my room with Owen in my arms.

I didn’t know who to turn to since I didn’t know how to explain myself and I roughly knew what others would’ve responded to my nonsense.

In the end, I managed to convince myself that it is all in my mind and nothing more.

I should be confident with myself knowing that I just gave birth to a human being and that I am tired, which in result require assistance from others when I am unable to complete certain tasks.

Nobody is ever perfect.

I accepted that I am no exception from that statement above.

I’m learning to count my blessings even if it may not seem that much of a blessing to others.

Seeing my boy smile whenever I open the door fills my soul 😍

Until next time 😘

xoxoxo